About Harp

Hey, this is Ann. I’ve spent years doing original research around interpersonal conflict, and I learned something interesting.

Everyone knows you're supposed to “be nice.” Blah, blah, blah, we've heard it all before.

But what if their version of “be nice” means getting screwed over yourself? That's what real interpersonal conflict feels like — like people are making demands of us beyond what we can give.

What we need isn't more moralizing or strategies that require the willpower of gods. We need to address the core reason that conflict is so hard: the brain.

When you, and I, and the people we have conflict with get triggered in an argument, our focus shrinks. We can no longer see nuance and creative problem-solving without gargantuan effort, which is always a highly limited resource. So exactly when we need our most complex thinking — to figure out how to reach a resolution that satisfies multiple competing desires — it's unavailable.

Harp exists to augment our minds, so we can avoid the oh-so-human ways we all self-sabatage and actually resolve conflict instead.